Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
