Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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