Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
