Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
