I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize