this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
