He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
