i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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