Your face is a jimmy john
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
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