She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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