The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
You're completely useless in the revolution.
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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