Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
