..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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