Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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