I don't think brook has ever known best
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
