I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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