a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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