I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize
