we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Bring me that man meat
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
