Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
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