I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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