I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Everclear isn't food dammit
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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