i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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