i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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