There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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