i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
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We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
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i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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