She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
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Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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