But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
