Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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