I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
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