a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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