we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Randomize
