She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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