ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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