Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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