Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
that is very illegal...i love you.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
