how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
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And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
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I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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