doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
i drank out of a bidet.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
