Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
