Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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