Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i used baking grease as lip gloss
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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