you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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