better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize