Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.