Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
im so drunk with asians
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
These 21 Declassified Government Horrors Are Unimaginable
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?