standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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