Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
