I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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