All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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