the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Randomize
