There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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