white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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