it wasn't lemon gatorade
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
