I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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