this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
i believe in u and ur pee
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
