I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Panties = found
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
